Back from Vacation

Well, I have been back a week now but I am finally starting to get back into the regular routine of life. I did not stick to any sort of diet while on vacation and therefore even being back a week I am still up 1 lb (it was pretty bad weighing myself the day after I got home, I will probably avoid that in the future). I am struggling with the "slow and steady" approach I am taking to losing weight this time. A part of me looks back to when I lost weight in 2010 and constantly compares my progress to then, which is not smart since I was way more strict with my diet and overall I have more enthusiasm for the whole thing. Oh well, time to stop living in the past and be present as my mom would say :)


So its time to start taking this blog seriously and begin holding myself more accountable. Below is an update/list of my current goals. I am giving my self a lot of time to reach them to try and avoid stress and/or feeling like a failure if my body doesn't cooperate.


Weight: 199.8
Weight Goal: 175 by 2015
Ultimate weight Goal: 145 by 2016

Fitness level: 5k running distance
Goal Fitness level: 13.1 by 2015
Ultimate Goal Fitness level: 26.2 by 2016



And finally, a before picture (not the best because it was taken by my five year old, but I seriously have no pictures of myself)

 

 Before as in what I look like now :)

Sucking It Up (Or Not)

Well, this week has been interesting.  I came down with some ferocious cold that has left me without energy.  I've still managed to exercise-- though not as much-- and I've still managed to keep my calories within the food diary limits.  But my biggest challenge has been getting enough water.

Seriously, with a throat that feels like I've tried to swallow sandpaper, you'd think I'd want to drink more water.  Not too mention that in my neck of the week our highs have been over 100 degrees.

What is my problem??  Drinking a lot of water really makes me feel better.  It helps with my appetite a ton.  But I just have trouble chugging it all down, I guess.  Clearly I'm not a camel!

There's got to be a way to make drinking my water more appealing...though come to think of it, I often put it off because I'm going to be getting in the car again (my life is lived in a car, it feels like) and after five kids, "holding it" ranges from very uncomfortable to downright impossible.  Do camels have trouble with that?  Probably not.

I need to channel my inner camel.

Official Weigh-In #3 (Heidi)

Sometimes the scale is so frustrating!!

OK, I shouldn't complain.  My scale read 151.0 pounds today, which is down from my last official weigh-in.  But it's a higher number than the last couple of days, so a bit of a let down.  Really, I know better.  The number is just a number, and it will fluctuate depending on my monthly cycle and other situations (like whether I get sick) no matter how perfectly  I keep to my food diary.  It's all about the general trend instead of the results of a specific day.  That's why I weigh myself daily, instead of only once a week.  So I can see that fluctuation and not get discouraged when my official number is not what I hoped.

The emotional side of weight loss is hard.  I don't mean the part where we eat for emotional reasons (like when we get stressed or sad)-- though that certainly is a major hurdle, possibly even a more difficult one.  Rather, I mean our reactions to the whole process.  When I want to throw in the towel completely because I have one bad day, when I tell myself that I'm a horrible person for giving in to my munchies, when I think that I must have no self-control at all, when the number on the scale doesn't match my expectations . . . all of these are emotional sand traps that tend to keep me from progressing.  I get down on myself and I want to quit.

There's a quote that helped me last time; I memorized it and told it to myself over and over.  I need to get back to that because it really makes a difference.

"You only fail when you give up."

As long as I keep trying, I will succeed eventually.  Even if it takes me longer than I wanted to reach my goals.  If it is going to take me a year (or longer) to reach my goal weight that time is going to pass anyway.  2015 will be here sooner than I think.  But if I don't give up and I try again, I will be in a much better position next year than I will be if I give up now because the scale doesn't drop fast enough!

Thirsty

What is up with my inability to drink enough water??  Where I live it's already in the high 90's and I feel parched often enough.  But Sunday and Monday I did not meet my water goal, and I'm really behind already for Tuesday.

Today I'm going to do it.

(It just may be tricky with all the running around and double-booked activities I have going on.  Bathroom breaks might be a tad hard to fit in.)

At least I've kept my eating on track!

Yay for Gelato!

Another day of success!

Yesterday I survived my 11 mile run and then also avoided the trap of eating too much to "celebrate."  I will admit I had some gelato (Italian ice cream) when I went out for a date with my hubby, but when I splurge I do like it to be worth it.  (Plus, I was pleasantly surprised when I looked up the nutrition info and found that it only had 180 calories in a 3.5 oz serving.)

I'm now halfway through my Sunday, which is going more or less OK so far.  Still have to make it through dinner at my mom's house without overeating.  So tough, but I can do this!

Official Weigh-In #2 (Heidi)

Well, I weighed in at 151.6 this morning.  That's a whopping 0.2 pounds of weight loss.  But still, it's a loss!  Especially considering there was a road trip & a funeral mixed in this week, I'm quite happy that I didn't gain anything.

Now, if I really wanted to cheat, I could go in and weigh myself right now.  I'm sure it would be even lower because I just finished an 11 mile run and sweated buckets while I was doing it.  But I'm trying to track my fat loss, not my water loss.  The way I try to control for that it is to always weigh myself in the morning before I get dressed for the day or eat breakfast.  That makes it about as consistent as it can be.

This week I am challenging myself to keep my food diary every single day (including Sunday) and also to make sure I get in at least 64 ounces of water every day.  It's getting hot around here and I especially don't want to get dehydrated. Plus it will help me snack less, I think.  I'll report on how it goes.  Here's to another week of positive changes!

Why I Run

I've had a couple of days keeping right to my food diary, so I think I'm getting back in the groove after the trip disruption.  Now it's Amy's turn!  I'm curious about what her game plan is for her vacation (maybe she'll post about it when she gets back).

I thought today I'd post a little more about exercise.  I've been exercising at least a little (even if not always consistently) pretty much since after I had my first baby.  But I really ramped up the exercise last time I lost all my baby weight.  The biggest change was that I took up running.

I hated running.  I swore I would never do it, unless to save my life.  I mocked people who went out for jogs. I was sure that only skinny, anorexic, crazy people went running.  But when I was challenged to compete in a sprint triathlon and took on a couch to 5k program, I learned something that made all the difference.

Running burns more calories than just about anything else I could do.

Well, I can burn an equal amount of calories doing something else, but it takes longer.  So I get the most weight loss bang for my buck out of running.  It might work differently for someone else (all our bodies are different), but for me, running was the perfect exercise for weight loss.

I still hate it.

To motivate myself to keep going, I usually try to find one or two events to train for.  They have to be a challenge, something that I will have to work for so that I actually drag myself out of bed at the crack of dawn to get the training in.  This year I've set my sights on two, though the actual events won't be until early 2015.  One is a 26k trail run (that's about 17 miles up and down hills on rocky trails).  The other is my first marathon.

I have a countdown to remind myself to keep working.  I can do this!

Post Trip Recap

Well.

I'm back from my trip out of state, and I guess it could be worse.  There is nothing harder (in my humble opinion) for dieting than traveling.  In my case it involved a long drive (where I did a lot of snacking to stay awake) and tricky situations like a catered luncheon.  I fully intended to keep my food diary throughout the trip but it didn't happen.  Thumbs down.  On the other hand, I still managed to get exercise in half the days of my trip.  Thumbs up!  (Not an easy feat, that.)  Still, I don't feel terribly satisfied with myself.

No matter.  Today I've kept my food diary accurate and stayed within my calorie limit, plus getting my regular time on the bike in.  I only fail if I give up!

Weigh In #1

Official weigh-in morning:

151.8

Well, I've seen lower numbers on the scale this week, but I did say I was going to count Saturday as my official number for the week.  Anyway, at least it's lower than my "starting over" weight.  I can do this!

Inspiration

I spent the morning reading my weight loss blog I kept 4 years ago when I first discovered weight loss blogs and decided to keep one myself. I had this vague idea that when I first started running and losing weight that it was easy and I have been a little depressed that this time is not as shinny and new. Well, reading my blog was an eye opener. I struggled ALL THE TIME. I struggled with running, with little cheats here and there, doubts that it was worth it, and in the end I managed to lose weight and feel better overall. I needed this inspiration from myself. To read this basically gave me the kick in the pants I have been needed lately to not feel so down on myself for not being as awesome as I used to be (memories are faulty).

This week has been pretty good as far as exercise and counting calories. I ran 3 miles without walking for the first time since I had my baby last year and (surprise) it wasn't as hard as I kept telling myself it would be. Next week will be a challenge, we leave for vacation for 6 days and I am already worried about how much weight I will gain and need to come up with some sort of realistic guideline for myself on how to not go crazy eating but also relax and not spend the whole time obsessing about every bite. Totally doable!

What Next?

Another day of meeting my target eating goal!  That goal is strictly calorie related.  Next week, when I get back into town, I think it's time to add another goal.  I just can't decide between making sure I drink enough water every day or adding more veggie servings in.  Hmmm.  I think I'll go with the water first.  Summer is coming up and dehydration is a very real concern where I live.  Plus, extra water will help me stay fuller longer, I know from experience.  Anyway, there's no point in tackling a brand new habit right before traveling though.  Best if I start when I get back.  Probably next Wednesday.

Quick Check In

Yikes!  So much for my daily check-in!

This week has been crazy, and it's not over yet so this will be just a short blurb today.  I had my mother-in-law in town and then my grandfather passed away, on top of the normal end of the school year craziness going on.  The good news is that even with all this I've managed to keep my food diary updated, and I've stayed within my target for each day.

The real trick will be when I travel out of state this weekend for the funeral.  There will be a couple of long days in the car and not much chance to exercise (if any).  Travel is tricky for me too because I usually end up eating way more than I ever intend.  The good thing is that this is the first trip where I'll have a smartphone so I can keep my food diary up to date even through the trip.  Hopefully it makes a difference!

Frowny Faces Are Not Always Bad

Amy and I are both counting calories, which I know in some people's book is a curse, rather than helpful.  But for me it's been absolutely necessary to really know what's going into my mouth.  That way I make better decisions about whether a treat is really worth the calories it costs, I guess.  This is vital for someone like me who has found that making any kind of food off-limits (particularly if it's one of my favorites) backfires because I just can't stick with it very long.

For my calorie counting I use myfooddiary.com.  It's a subscription food diary (so you have to pay a monthly fee to use it) but I've decided the $9/month is worth it.  I like the format, I like how I can enter my own recipes, and the number of foods that are already in the database is quite large.  One of the little features that myfooddiary uses to motivate is when you finish your diary for the day it gives you a bunch of green smiley faces for meeting certain positive dieting goals or red frowny faces for less than stellar choices.  Only once in the several years I've been keeping a food diary have I ever managed to get all smiley faces at the end of a day.  Usually I get a frowny for my sodium intake and my saturated fats being too high.  (Can't be perfect, I guess.)

Yesterday was a new record for me.  Not a good one though.  I had only one smiley face and SIX frownies.  At least I didn't drink any alcohol and got one positive!  Really, though, I'm quite proud of myself.  I usually don't track my eating on Sunday at all (it's my "free" day, if you will) because I know it's going to be my worst day of the week.  But yesterday, despite the fact that I knew we would be celebrating my sister's birthday and there would be no exercise and a host of other negative things, I still kept my food diary.  I even entered every little thing I ate, down to the snitch of chocolate chips I grabbed at bedtime (I need to get rid of that habit!).  The best part was that even though my eating wasn't spectacularly good yesterday, keeping the food diary accurately kept me within the calorie limit for me to at least maintain my weight.  Absolutely necessary if I'm going to have a weekly cheat day!

Amy's Intro

Hi, I'm Amy. Not all a new to this weight loss thing. Second time slim might be more accurate at 8th or 9th time slim. I have been dieting in some form off and on for the past 10 years (I should have started way before that but never really took it seriously after a failed attempt at Jenny Craig when I was 13). Ten years ago I was first really successful with a modified fast diet that was monitored by a doctor and lost 70 lbs. The problem with "modified fasts" is you can't eat that way forever, so once I tried to eat normal that was that and I gained the weight back. So I went on like this for 5 years....a few months on the modified fast, a few months off, losing weight and gaining weight constantly. Then I had my first daughter and realized that I don't want her to constantly struggle with weight and the best way to try and accomplish that was to be a better example for her. So I cut out dairy, started counting calories, running and lost 95lbs. I did pretty OK and staying in a good-ish healthy range for myself for three years. Then I got pregnant with number 2 baby and couldn't keep up the exercise while pregnant. My baby is now 6 months old and I still need to lose 60 lbs. I am doing it a little different this time around. I am still counting calories but I do allow myself a cheat day once a week, which is a slower weight loss process but something I think I am keep up for a very long time.

So here's where I am at:

Starting Weight: 200.2
Goal Weight: 140.


Non weight loss goals are to get back to running. I have worked my way up to a 5k after having baby #2 and would like to be able to run the Half Marathon of the Phoenix Marathon in March of 2015.

Lets do this!

Ooops

I ended up eating WAY more than I intended to yesterday.  Oops. I made the classic mistake of assuming that I had more calories available from exercise than I really did.  1,300 calories extra is a ton, you know?  Oh dear.  But today is a new day and I only fail when I give up.  This was a learning experience.

Today is going be a challenge though.  Sundays are always my personal Waterloo.  The goal is to absolutely enter everything I eat, even when I go to dinner at my parents' house (a weekly tradition around here).  Hopefully that will help me stay on track and not overeat.  I can do this!!

Courage Needed

Maybe it's stubbornness I need, rather than courage.  Or maybe both would do it.

Anyway, this morning was official weigh in day for the week, and wouldn't you know it?  My weight is up 0.6 pounds.  That's not a lot.  It's not even a pound.  But when your goal is to lose 1/2 pound a week, and you've worked hard all week and kept all your goals, it's frustrating to see the number go up!

Now I've been doing this long enough to know that this is normal.  The number may fluctuate but over time, as long as I'm consistent, the trend will be downward.  However, handling a weight increase emotionally, no matter how seemingly insignificant, is a whole different matter.  I get so frustrated and depressed and I just want to throw in the towel.  Or resign myself to just maintaining this weight, rather than trying to lose.

No.  I'm not giving in to negative thoughts.  This temporary.  I just need to keep working and be patient.  My changes will be slow, and that's by design, since I'm making permanent changes, not yo-yo ones.

On a more positive note, I ran 11 miles today (burning more than 1300 calories per my food diary).  Afterward, I treated myself to a McDonald's sundae.  Yes, all the experts say it's counter-productive to reward yourself with dessert when you finish a workout.  But I think 1300 calories more than covered my little hot fudge sundae with nuts.  That's part of what makes these changes livable.

Now back to my healthy eating!

Lament of the Lettuce

My diet has two really big weak areas-- my love affair with sugar and my lack of vegetables.  The sugar affair, well, I'm not going to give it up cold turkey forever and ever.  I've tried it and it didn't work.  I didn't feel the cravings go away (like so many of my no-sugar, no-processed, no-anything-that-tastes-good friends promised).  So I've made a truce with it.  I'll try to minimize the sugar I eat, and savor it it smaller doses, with the goal of those savoring moments getting smaller and fewer.

Vegetables are trickier.  I have nothing personal against them.  I even like some of them.  But somehow, I never seem to manage to eat them much.  Back when I was a much more dedicated to healthy eating mom, I made a huge effort to serve lots of vegetables all the time, so my kids would grow up liking them.  It kind of worked (with some veggies, anyway-- like broccoli & peas).  But as my life has gotten more frantic and I've added more kids to the mix, my effort at preparing and serving veggies had decreased exponentially.  In my defense, cooking for a family of seven while handling all the schedule craziness that comes as the kids get older is much more challenging than cooking for a family of four.  (And expensive.  But that's a topic for another time.)

Anyway, I have such grand intentions every week when I go grocery shopping.  I always intend to add more veggies to the cart.  Snap peas, sweet potatoes, cucumbers, zucchini, tomatoes, carrots, green leaf & romaine lettuces.  I actually like to eat these things.  But almost every week I get them, I never cook them or eat them, and then they go bad (with the exception of the carrots, which I regularly snack on).  Then the next week at the grocery store I stand around in the produce aisle debating whether or not I should spend the money on food that is probably just going to be wasted.  Did I mention how expensive it is to feed a family of seven?

What to do?  In my fridge I had a head of green leaf lettuce.  I haven't even unwrapped yet though I bought it more than a week ago.  In fact, it's probably wilted and nasty by now.  But every day the week I had plans to break it out and make myself a yummy tossed salad with sauteed chicken and garlic.  Never happened.

Bother.

I've got to get better about eating my veggies!!

"Extra" Calories

Well, yesterday I did better about tracking exactly what I ate, and I made it under my calorie goal for the day.  Woohoo!  One day down.  It helps that I get a good number of extra calories allotted for the day through my exercise.

What about exercise?  Is it helpful for weight loss or not?  I know the experts say emphatically "YES!"  And clearly I am on the exercise boat or I wouldn't be doing it.  But I have my doubts as to whether or not exercise is a must.  The first 20 pounds of my previous successful weight loss happened while I was not exercising at all.  Literally.  I was restricted to bed rest during my pregnancy and started losing weight like mad (even though normally you gain during pregnancy).  It was 100% due to the diabetes diet I was on.  This is important for me to keep in mind because sometimes exercise just isn't possible.  Injuries and illness happen.  (Boy, do they ever!)  But lack of exercise won't derail me if I really make sure what I eat lines up with my non-activity status.

However, for the most part I am now a compulsive exerciser.  On the whole it's a good thing.  I average about 700 extra calories a day added to my food diary tracker because of my workouts.  The tricky part is that exercise really increases my appetite.  I don't know for whom it is an appetite suppressant but I am clearly not that lucky.  When I finish a workout I am starving . . . and it is so tempting to feel like I get to "treat" myself for working so hard.

Those extra calories are my lifesaver though.  They allow me to eat enough to feel full and still eat mostly the same stuff as the rest of my family.  (I don't have the energy to cook myself something separate from everyone else, and my kids would howl at having to live off "rabbit food" all the time.)

More changes to come soon, but for right now I'm still going to keep working on making sure my food diary is super accurate!